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| Image-In Mysore, by Admin |
Gaze at stars
Count one two till it
Falls for you
Pluck the rose
Look into her eyes
Hear deep breaths
Inner voice
Reads vital heart graphs
To beat peaks
Inner voice wants us to scale the unimaginable heights, friend, set out for this journey, take a deep breath, get the stars shining and yes, we will do it. Knock inner self daily, beak the peaks!
This Haiku is written for Haiku Heights and Haiku My Heart. The prompt for this week is Vital.
This is beautiful...you are right about the condensed form 3 5 3. I am held captive to 5 7 5. Next time I'll try it.
ReplyDeleteWhat a generous trio of 3-5-3 poetry, very impressive skill to write these.
ReplyDeleteMAgical haiku this.. the kinds i like.. it has stars.. it has inner voice.. it has eyes.. it has rose! It;s beautiful.. enjoyed readin this!
ReplyDeleteGaze at stars
Count one two till it
Falls for you
This haiku.. my fav.. loved it!
First time here as far as i can remember. Delightful haiku. Words with many meanings, all positive.
ReplyDeletepeace
Very insightful and delightful haiku ~ Wonderful ~ thanks ^_^ (A Creative Harbor)
ReplyDeletelove the 1st stanza, but the set was lovely.....as were your afterwords....nice and succinct message sent
ReplyDeleteWow..simply wow..Jaideep...that's it..
ReplyDeleteLovely lines Jaideep :-)
ReplyDeleteLOVELY BRO! I loved the title itself.. each set is soo deep and intriguing I wonder how "SHE" is actually now :)
ReplyDeleteDearest friend.
ReplyDeleteBecause I care about your writing which is prolific, I am going to tell you these points:
Haiku doesn't have any title, nor statements. Haiku is objective while this is subjective. Haiku shows while this one tells. Haiku consists of two juxtaposed images. Haiku respects nature and does not use it as a tool to pass over ideas. Through haiku, nature teaches us something about human nature.
For all these reasons I consider this a short poem and not three haiku. It is a stunning short poem. Haiku doesn't belong to higher rank of literature. It is just onother genre.
If you want to learn more about haiku, you can look for the haiku journals where you can read articles about haiku. You can join the monthly haiku contests such as the International Kukai:
http://rita-odeh.blogspot.co.il/search/label/International%20Kukai
Every haijin(haiku poet)will be asked to write up to 3 haiku about the same topic. This month's topic is:( Forget Me Not)which is a flower.
We collect all the recieved haiku, then send them to the haijin's emails
without the names of the poets. The haijins have 6 points to vote for their best 3 haiku. This process teaches me how to write good haiku because I try to check what made a certain haiku win the first, second or third place.
You are a skillful poet whom I enjoy reading.
I can asure you that I can recognize your poem even if it is not signed by your name because you have a remarkable style in writing.
All the best,
Rita
Hi Rita,
DeleteAppreciate your concern and comment. I'll surely do a introspection. I am quite not sure of the points that you put forward in the first para. For haiku writing, I am very much inspired by Rameshji and Pranita. I always attempted to keep it simple as my audience include, not only poets, but general readers. Last lines that you wrote has given me lot of confidence. Thank you for the lovely criticism. I'll try researching and improve.
Best,
Jaideep
I agree with what Rita advised you and with and all the praises and encouragement. If you like to read some haiku resources on how to improve, you can go to my blog and check out Resources. :-)
DeleteHave a blessed day!
Christine/Chrissi
I loved this...
ReplyDeleteInner voice
Reads vital heart graphs
To beat peaks
Good work!!!
The inner voice is potent. It creates vision which helps extend our horizon. You've done just that in this haiku set, Great write Jaideep!
ReplyDeleteHank
Ah, Jaideep. My heart is going pit-a-pat just reading of your romance.
ReplyDeleteLovely. Jim
Jim's Haiku Heights
Very romantic. :-)
ReplyDeleteLoved each one. They work so well as a trio to convey dizzying experience of romance.
ReplyDeleteDue to computer problems, I'm late with visiting the haiku-circle... but here I am, enjoying your photo and haiku. Reach for the stars. Enjoy your week!
ReplyDeleteThis is a wonderfully crafted haiku with a very deep spiritual meaning. I can feel the stones giving me their lessons. I wonder ... what will the stones tell and learn me ...?
ReplyDelete